This blog is one of a series charting my discoveries in blending Dramatherapy, fooling and Internal Family Systems (IFS). I completed my training in IFS last October and have since been integrating it into my toolkit via facilitating various workshops, projects and online one-to-ones. I am also part of a wonderful research group made up of IFS trained clowns and fools. You can read more about IFS and my journey with it here and see what the research group gets up to here.

This blog charts an incredible 2-day therapeutic process which I got to facilitate in London earlier on this year for Emily, a freelance multi-disciplinary artist, theatre practitioner and community music facilitator. Emily has attended many of my Clowning and Fooling workshops over the last 5 years. I went on to work with her one-to-one online as part of her Arts Council funded 'Developing Your Creative Practice'(DYCP) project. As a finale for our work together, we both agreed it would be amazing to have two full days together in a studio. 

The process that unfolded was so powerful, deep, surprising and satisfying that I wanted to share a bit about what we discovered. This blog describes some of the processes that we used and the impact they had on Emily's life and career. She has generously given her full permission for me to share this work.

Beginning As Equals

We began with a check-in, clarified our aims: to strengthen Emily's confidence as a leader and agreed how we wanted to work together. And then we danced. We found ways to connect with each other through movement, voice and play. We explored the space and the objects in it, finding simple games to play together. 

It felt really important to begin this process as an equal playmate, to bring some of myself into the process, to set up a culture of true collaboration, rather than me being the expert / one in charge and Emily being the student / passive recipient.

Parts Mapping

Once we'd connected through play, we used an IFS technique of parts mapping to explore which inner parts had been present while we moved and played (by 'parts' I mean the tribe of inner voices that live inside humans - they can appear as body sensations, emotions, thoughts or impulses). We drew simple outlines of our bodies, before sitting and rolling back through the morning and remembering which parts had been around during the activities. 

We focussed on the parts one at a time, noticing their qualities (i.e hot or cold, big or small, still or moving, which colours, sounds, smells etc) and where they lived in or around our bodies, before using felt tip pens to make a mark on our body-outline to represent each part. 

We shared what we'd discovered with each other. Again, I wanted to bring a bit of my own inner world into the process, so that we were beginning as equals and so that Emily could see some of the lenses through which I would be viewing her, through our time together.

Embodying Parts / Fooling

From here, Emily then began exploring her parts in more depth, by giving them her body and voice on the Fools “stage.” 

There was no stage, just a designated part of the rehearsal room where the play took place. If you've not come across Fooling before, it is an exquisite form of solo improvisation, where the player steps into the empty space and embodies their inner voices. It can be used as a tool for personal development, a way of generating material for devised theatre or a performance method in itself. I have been studying Fooling with Franki Anderson for over two decades. 

Because Emily has been training in Fooling with me for a number of years, she was able jump straight into the form. Starting with the parts that appeared on her body map, Emily began placing each part on the stage. Others showed up to help and hinder the process and they were all warmly invited to find their place.  

One part sprawled on the floor, another stood up at the top of the stair case, one hid in a corner, one was even discovered in the toilet during a break! Using the ‘Assembling Your Inner Cast’ process that I originally learned from Franki Anderson during my 2017 Stage Fright research project, I asked each part their name and wrote the names on small bits of paper, placing the name tags where each part had appeared in the space.

Embodying her parts seemed to help Emily to understand them from the inside, through discovering their posture, how they moved and the qualities of their voices she began to tap into their emotional frequencies.

Mapping her parts in space allowed Emily begin to see the relationship between her parts. She began to understand how some parts protect other parts, some work together to try to keep other parts safe, some parts are in conflict with each other and some parts are maverick lone rangers, completely unaware that they are part of a system.

IFS Direct Access

In the afternoon, we followed Emily’s curiosity to get to know some of her parts a little more. I used the IFS 'direct access' technique to interview some of her parts. 'Direct Access' is where the IFS therapist  / practitioner talks directly to a part and the client answers as the part. This allowed us to find out what roles the parts were playing were in the system, how long they’ve been doing their jobs, how they feel about their roles and what they fear might happen if they weren’t doing what they do.

During the IFS interviews, Emily was able to notice when other parts piped up. She followed her impulses to step out of the part we were focussing on and take the spot of the part who was trying to get our attention, giving them her body and voice so we could find out what they needed to say. 

IFS is usually experienced sitting in one place and these part-dialogues often happen internally, with the IFS therapist / practitioner supporting the client to silently interview their own parts and report back what their parts are saying. Having the parts mapped out in space seemed to give Emily a multi dimensional awareness of her parts and how they interrelate, which allowed us to enter into a fluid, unfolding inquiry for a few hours. 

Finding Self

On the second day we recommenced with a check-in and a warm up before Emily returned to animating her parts constellation. After a free-form improvisation, I asked Emily's parts whether they might like to try a different configuration, one where they can work together to support Emily to step into her power as a choir leader. There was much discussion amongst the parts, before a new part arrived centre stage. This part was calm, confident and clear, taking the reins of the process and helping each of the parts to find a new spot in the room where their contributions could support Emily to step into her power. 

I had a sense that this new cast member might actually be Emily's SELF - an IFS term which describes the core element which exists in every person - it's the part that is able to welcome all the other parts with kindness, compassion and curiosity. She worked carefully, steadily and respectfully, switching between herself and the parts, helping some of them to come into supportive connection with each other, some formed pairs and others sturdy triads, she gently and intentionally separated some parts from each other to reduce the friction and helped the Lone Rangers come into the fold.

I slipped into the role of compassionate witness, marvelling at Emily's natural ability to work so skilfully with her cast.

Key Learnings

Having two full days to do this piece of work allowed us time to gently create a good working culture together before diving into the parts work. Two days allowed us to cover a lot of ground, to get to know many of Emily's parts. I am mindful that this piece of work built on our 5-year working relationship - we have cultivated a lot of trust between us, as well as a shared language of clowning and fooling. I think if I was to do this process with someone who hasn't attended my workshops, it would need to be much longer.

Bringing IFS into the 'Assembling Your Inner Cast' process helped me to guide the parts into a much deeper inquiry than when I last offered 'Assembling Your Inner Cast' as a 5-day workshop for a group of 6. Using the IFS protocol helped me slow everything down and meet each part with more respect and care. 

I recognise that in the olden days when teaching Fooling, I was often embodying Self for the participants, encouraging them to embody their parts on stage whilst I held the role of Self from the sidelines. IFS training has taught me how to help people access their own Self energy, which feels much more empowering, both on stage and in life. I trusted the process with Emily, embodying Self on her behalf until she was ready to take over. Bringing myself and my parts into the process at the beginning of the process felt like a key factor in creating an atmosphere of equality - we were just two humans, imperfectly playing together, sharing the leadership, co-creating games and sharing our vulnerability with each other.

Working with just one person, rather than a group of 6, allowed us to work at a pace that felt right for us and our parts. We could follow their flow and when it got too much, we could put everything down and dance or shake or sing together, this brought a lightness and spaciousness to what could have been an incredibly intense process.

I really enjoyed the depth and creativity of this process and hope that I'll get to do it again with more artists in The Future.

Emily's description of the process

"This was a transformative experience the benefits of which have been holistic and are ongoing. I love the embodied approach Holly uses and also her skill in facilitation IFS in combination with dramatherapy has lead me to moments where I’ve felt empowered to face up to issues that I would previously have run away from, denied or pushed down. 

I can’t recommend working with Holly enough, and the unique cross over between her performance and therapeutic backgrounds combine in a way that I find empowering because I can express myself creatively and be witnessed compassionately. 

Thank you Holly."

- Emily, Freelance multi-disciplinary artist, theatre practitioner and community music facilitator

To read more about IFS and my journey with it click here.

To see what our clown/fool/IFS research group gets up to, click here.

To hear about upcoming workshops and one-to-ones join my mailing list using the box at the bottom of this page.